The 4P Framework: Pause, Play, Passion and Purpose
🙏 Weigh in on the 4P Framework of Pause, Play, Passion and Purpose; influence my thoughts on this and spend a few minutes to help me explain the Framework better
Dear Inner Circle (Yes, you - if you’re receiving this, you’re part of my tribe, and I am so grateful you are here with me🙏),
As you know, I am writing a book on beautiful things, things I believe we all need more of while we’re here. I believe these things will change the tenor of our lives if they become central to how we live.
I’ve drafted a fuller explanation of these beautiful things - Pause, Play, Passion and Purpose - and how they work together in something I call the 4P Framework.
I would love your help with it if you have 10-30 minutes this month. If you do have a little time, here’s how you can help:
Please read the below (it should take around 5 minutes).
Think about where it doesn’t make sense to you. Where are you stumbling? Where do you need more information or examples? What simply doesn’t make sense to you?
Write down your questions and/or suggestions for adding or deleting something.
Then send the above to me by leaving a comment at the bottom of this post, sending me an email or setting up a quick time to chat with me.
Your time is your most precious commodity. If you choose to spend some of it on this with me, I’ll be more than grateful. And I’ll return your time to you in kind.
The 4P Framework
What it is
The 4P Framework is a life approach that can help you figure out who you are and what you can and wish to offer the world. It is also a model you can use to help you figure out where you may be off balance and what you can do to rebalance.
It works for all ages in all stages of life, so whether you’re 17, on the cusp of your life’s many wild and wacky adventures or in your 30s working long hours and raising children, or looking back at the decades that flew like the wind in your 60s or 70s, the 4P Framework can help you (re)calibrate your life and take action to live it more fully again or more than you have up to now.
There are four parts to the 4P Framework:
Pause
Play
Passion
Purpose
There is a fifth “P” without which none of the other “P”s – or the framework – can fully function: Pleasure. Pleasure is the linchpin.
This book explores the interaction between these elements, how they fit, flow and work together.
You may be familiar with the wealth of research and work on pause, play, passion, purpose and pleasure that exists. These subjects have been studied separately for almost as long as we have existed. The point we’ll explore in this book, however, is how the 4Ps are interconnected - not separate - and how together, they lead to a life that lights you up and inspires your best work, life and experience on the planet.
How it works
First of all, the 4P Framework is not linear. You do not have to start at one point and then move to the next. You can jump into the framework at any of the four points you feel drawn to.
In work with my clients, I’ve noticed that when they are in full overwhelm, Pause is a very good place to start. They often need a full reset before they can begin to think about – or have the energy for – any of the other elements. So, if you’re at your wits’ end, Pause is a good place to begin.
Other clients have needed to start with Play to jumpstart their love of life again, and again, this works very well. Reintroducing joy, delight and playfulness, if only for a few minutes a day brings tremendous rewards, as we’ll discuss in the Play chapter.
Other clients have wanted to spend more focused time exploring their Passion(s). These are often my writers, artists and musicians, but they also include makers who must be making to kickstart their lives again and cerebrals who miss working on solving the mysteries of life.
Finally, there are a lucky few who know from birth what their Purpose is and pursue it with a passion – until Life happens and they report having lost sight of it. For some, diving right back into their purpose is where they need to start.
The linchpin that makes all of the other elements work is, of course, Pleasure. You’ll know you’re starting in the right place when you encounter pleasure. If you feel pressure to start somewhere, don’t. My very best counsel is to start where it feels good.
So, yes, bear this in mind: the 4P Framework is not linear. It is an infinity loop, and here’s how it works.
Pause is a direct route to Purpose
When working with my clients and studying the lives of those who have actively pursued their purpose, we’ve found that discovering one’s purpose starts with quietening the mind and body. Purpose is most easily found when activity and thinking slow down or settle.
One can be born with a sense of purpose, often expressed through preferences and play when a child is young. One way to look at it is to see this purpose emerging from one’s second-greatest pause (life before birth).
But when one is not clear on one’s purpose, pausing, taking a sabbatical, going away (or staying home and creating a place of tranquility and peace) and quietening the mind and body is the most direct route to reconnecting with one’s purpose. This will be explored further in the Purpose chapter.
Play is a direct route to Passion
Much as Pause can be the direct line to one’s Purpose, Play is a direct line to one’s Passion. In fact, it is hard to imagine finding one’s passion without playing. Passion evokes energy above and beyond daily living. It is that activity – or that living being – that takes all of you, the one you absolutely love. The best way to find it is to first open oneself up to play, to experimentation, to exploration, to discovery. When one cannot find one’s passion, the first place to start is full-on play.
Pause can serve as an indirect route to Passion
Another way to get to one’s Passion is, as with Purpose, first starting with Pause; quietening the body and mind. Out of the quiet may come an impulse or an intuition. You may be moved to try or do something you haven’t done before. I find this is a longer route to Passion, but one that can be as enjoyable as Play. As we’ll see below in the Infinity Loop, if one is stuck in Passion, going back to a place of Pause can help you breathe oxygen into your fire, thus relighting it.
Play can serve as an indirect route to Purpose
As with Play, one will find one’s Passion, one can also find one’s Purpose. Though I find one’s Purpose comes more directly from a place of quiet and intention, as found in Pause, it can also come of Play. For example, one may find, in playing with a set of paints, a musical instrument, or words, that one’s true purpose is to create. As we’ll see below in the Infinity Loop, if one is stuck in Purpose, going back to a place of Play can help you unlock the “stuckness” you feel.
Pause plus Play leads to Passion plus Purpose
Of the 4P elements, there are two pairs that work very well together.
These are first, Pause and Play. When we pause, we can take a breath, step back and play; many of my clients have forgotten how to do both, or lead lives with very little pause and even less play. I find that if they have lost touch with their Passion and Purpose, it helps to start first with combining Pause and Play. They can choose which element to start with, practice that one for a while, and then start to combine it with its partner (i.e. start pausing for a while, add play a little later).
When I started applying this life approach, for example, I started with Pause. I started taking a pause each morning before launching into the day. I started sitting quietly, doing nothing but sitting, for five minutes. Once I had established a regular practice of pausing – even just once a day for a number of weeks – I started to add in play or playfulness. I would add a sense of lightness to my life. I’d sit down and play with my son or allow myself to doodle. I’d call a friend and laugh out loud. I’d practice pausing and playing regularly to see what would happen. Those two together led to my further exploring Passion and Purpose of their own accord. I did not need to push; in fact, it was important that I didn’t. I paid close attention to Pleasure – when things started to feel less pleasurable, I backed off and explored Pause and Play more. Pleasure, as we’ve said, and will explore later, is the linchpin.
Thus, the 4P Principle is rooted in what comes of the combination of Pause and Play, of what happens when humans, young and old, sit or stand still for a moment, and out of stillness, spontaneously begin to play. When they grow present, enter flow, and lose themselves in an activity. When judgement and self-consciousness are suspended, and they give themselves permission to experiment, try something new and create. When I watch children and adults alike enter this state, I see Passion, the third element of the 4P framework, alight. The 4P Framework holds that it is from Pause, Play and Passion that human Purpose emerges.
I find this other pair – Passion and Purpose – equally feeds Pause and Play. The energy that comes of Passion and the intention that comes of Purpose can move mountains. Passion and Purpose leads to more Play, and when one is fully in touch with these three elements, and paying attention to the mind and the body’s needs, one respects the need for Pause. You may think that one might get carried away with Passion, Purpose and Play, so much so that one might never want to stop. But the body and mind tire and they do stop. The Pause one takes at the end of a day full of Passion, Purpose and Play is full and whole and restorative, like a good night’s rest after a good run or a particularly powerful painting session or a meaningful conversation with a friend.
The infinity loop
In summary, the 4P Framework holds that:
Pause and Play are natural partners; out of pause flows play.
Passion and Purpose are natural partners; out of passion flows purpose.
From Pause comes Purpose.
From Play comes Passion.
A satisfying and fulfilling life is borne of time, attention and energy spent in each of these four elements, individually, in pairs and together, as one.
Put another way, without Pause, Play and Passion, it is difficult to discover, connect with or own one’s Purpose:
Until we step back, breathe, pause, give ourselves space,
Until we let go and let ourselves play,
Until we create the time and the space and the permission to freely explore our passions, paying close attention to the moments of flow and spark, we set alight in the pursuit of those things that make us feel alive (again),
We cannot deliver on our purpose.
If we look at the 4P Framework again, we’ll see an Infinity Loop and thus a key to how it all works:
If you start at Pause, you’ll get a direct line to Purpose.
If you get stuck in Purpose, you’ll need to go back to Play.
Play will take you to Passion.
If you get stuck in Passion, you’ll need to go back to Pause.
